I wasn't going to post today but I saw this quote online a few minutes ago and it really made me think.
All my life, I have worried about keeping everyone around me happy. In my mind, if you weren't happy with me, I was bad. I thought if people weren't happy with things I did or said, it meant I was wrong or it meant I was a disappointment.
At 41 years old, I can finally say I am learning to change this. It's a hard habit to break. When you've tried to be a people-pleaser your whole life, it becomes a bad habit just like smoking or chewing your nails. I often find myself giving up what I want, or sometimes what I need, so that others aren't upset with me. Don't get me wrong - I'm not talking about being a selfish jerk and ignoring other people's feelings. I'm talking about being you, unapologetically. I'm talking about learning it's ok to be different than someone else and to not agree with everything they say.
If you rely on other's happiness for your self-worth, stop. Stop now! I wish it hadn't taken me so long to learn this. The last few months, I've started to be more "Cheryl" than I feel I've ever been. And if people don't love all the parts of the real me, that's ok. I'm not going to be a jerk - on purpose, that is - but I am going to be me and I'm going to be ok with that.
It is not my job to be everything to everyone around me. Or to create happiness for those that can't do it for themselves. I will love those around me. I will be kind and generous. I will do what I can to help others - but I won't lose myself in the process, anymore.
If this is you, remember the wise words of Kevin Hart...